Rabbit: You totally cut me off during the Retro ReCAP. (˃ᆺ˂*)
Rabbit: When I was talking about Miranda.
Tiger: I cut you off because you were going down one of your rabbit holes again.
Rabbit: Well, I am a rabbit after all! /(>人<)\ Anyway, I wanted to chat more about the romance options.
Tiger: Here we go, the otome bunny has come out to play.
Rabbit: I think it's a big part of Mass Effect, you spend so much time with these people, it makes sense that your relationships expand.
Tiger: (Θ︹Θ) This is going to turn into a weird conversation.
Rabbit: How so?
Tiger: It's going to turn a little yuri since you always play as MaleShep.
Rabbit: I just find the female characters more interesting, like Miranda.
Tiger: I'm surprised you'd like Miranda since she's the Cerberus cheerleader and you didn't like working with the enemy. She's practically spying on you and reporting to the Illusive Man the entire game.
Rabbit: That is very true but I thought she redeemed herself in the third game a bit. Plus, I liked her loyalty mission, it showed that she wasn't just another ice queen.
Tiger: I don't know, I thought Miranda's involvement in Mass Effect 3 was pretty dumb. She once again is looking for her sister who just happens to go to a secret Cerberus lab where their father works to turn humans into husks? C'mon, a little too convenient.
Rabbit: They make a great power couple though if you think about it. Miranda with her perfect genes and biotic powers and Shepard with his “I can kill anything in the universe” abilities.
Tiger: I don't know, I think she may have been playing you the entire time and could still be working for Cerberus, just a thought. She was pretty secretive about what she was doing when she requested your assistance in ME3. ˚▱˚
Rabbit: She's just misunderstood, that's all. Now, Ashley-
Tiger: Here it comes. (︶︿︶) This is like your version of my Night Queen rant.
Rabbit: I'm still mad at the treatment I got from her. I save her on Eden Prime when her squad gets destroyed, we race across the galaxy together trying to stop Saren, fall in love, and then I die.
Tiger: That does have a way of ending relationships.
Rabbit: I get resurrected by Cerberus and see her again on Horizon. What does she do? She totally freaks out that I'm with Cerberus. Okay, granted I did freak out myself but she didn't even stick around to talk to me. I was dead for two years! Two years! Did everything we went through mean nothing? （｀Δ´）！
Tiger: She did send you that sappy email afterward.
Rabbit: I even played through the entire game alone so I wouldn't cheat on her. All of ME2 alone, alone when there was Tali! So, now I'm locked away like a criminal because I saved the galaxy not once, but twice and what happens, I run into Ashley again. She's been promoted and man, she was cold to me. Reapers attack, people die, blah blah, and now we find ourselves on Mars together. What does she do? She questions if I'm even really me? See'mon! I saved the galaxy from the Collectors and destroyed the base, I didn't give Cerberus anything yet she accuses me of knowing something about Cerberus' attack on Mars. ( ﾟДﾟ)＜!! I was locked up for Athame's sake!
Tiger: It would've been hard for you to know what was going on.
Rabbit: So after that, I worked really hard to repair our relationship, which I thought we did, but she kept bringing up my involvement with Cerberus. Even when we made it back to earth and I was going to sacrifice myself to save everyone, she still brought it up! Ashley! I don't work for Cerberus, I never did! I used them to save the galaxy when the Alliance was sitting on their hands! Dr. Chakwas understood this, she understood this from the get go. Why can't you?!
Tiger: Well, Dr. Chakwas is probably the coolest character out of the entire ME series, so you can't really blame Ashley. But man, that's pretty harsh. And you wasted all that time you could have spent with Tali.
Rabbit: Exactly! I come back to life after being dead for two years and what does it take to get Tali back on my side? “Oh, hey Tali, remember when I gave you Geth data for your pilgrimage?” “Of course I do, it's really you, I'll follow you until the end!” See, that's loyalty right there. (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)و
Tiger: (⺣◡⺣)♡* Tali did have a crush on you from the beginning. You saved her and practically swept her off her feet in ME1. Actually, come to think of it, you almost save all of your romantic options. There's Ashley, you save Kaidan on Virmire if you choose to do so, and you also save Liara. I don't think you could say that about Jack though.
Rabbit: Tali is the best one though. She's so awesome and understanding, she cares too. You totally help her out a lot as well. You save her from the Shadow Broker, defend her when she faces the Admiralty Board, comfort her when her father dies, and you even help her reclaim her homeworld! She never once questions you or tells you that she has more important things to do than help you save the entire galaxy.
Tiger: You really love Tali, don't you?
Rabbit: She's my OTP without a doubt. ( ˊᵕˋ )♡.°⑅